A night out in Chicago can be expensive. Between cabs rides, cover charges, and $15 martinis, we areusually broke as a joke come Monday morning. But we like going out and we really like vodka, so what’s a girl to do? The answer- throw a pre-party so good you’ll barely need to spend any money after you’ve left the house.

Lets be honest, a typical pre-party is usually just a way to get a buzz on before you go out but, at PLRG we don’t believe in typical pre-parties (we hate the idea of pounding drinks out red plastic cups and shoveling Tostitos in our mouths). We’re all grown-ups now, so its time to start pre-partying like ones. And no, this will not involve spending inordinate amounts of money. Throw everything you know about this sacred tradition out the window and replace it with this:

Before anyone arrives clean the place up. Girls we have been to your houses and we have seen how you live and, frankly it can be disgusting at times. This isn’t Hi-Tops, this is your home. Clean the hair and toothpaste blobs out of your bathroom sink before people come over!

Do not serve guests with red party cups…ever! You can find higher quality, better looking and cheaper glasses and dishware at your neighborhood garage sale. If pre-owned glasses give you the willies, try the uber cheap options at stores like Ikea or CB2. Don’t worry about everything matching perfectly. Just stick to one “theme” (i.e. all white glasses and dishware) and it’ll give your parties a pulled together, but not trying too hard look.

There’s nothing wrong with good ol’ buffalo wings at a pre-party. You can order them out for cheap or buy them frozen, then dress them up so it only looks like you spent all day cooking. You know that platter you practically got for free at that yard sale? Those take-out wings would look so much better on that platter if you placed them carefully atop lettuce leaves. There. What did that take 2 extra minutes? And now you look like f#&%ing Martha Stewart. You’re welcome.

Never underestimate the power of good lighting. Do the best with what you have by turning off those built in ceiling lights and turning on your reading lamps, floor-lamps, and lighting a few candles. Suddenly the room and everyone in it will look sexier. Remember that the pre-party can and should be just as fun and glamorous as the rest of your big night out.

Any other suggestions out there for throwing a killer pre-party?